The Lies We Tell Ourselves

A couple of weeks into joining the Cornerstone family, Pastor Daryl sent me an email informing me that I am to write a blog post. 

“What am I writing a blog post about?”

“Whatever you’d like!”

He said it like it was an exciting adventure, but it felt like being at the world’s largest buffet and being told to pick ONE thing. What in the world was I going to write about? What wisdom could I impart upon readers? For weeks I’ve been writing and rewriting possible posts in my head (aka procrastinating) and nothing seemed right. 

Then I had a rough day and realized I should write something that I need to hear right  now. Let’s talk about the lies our brains tell us and the truth God provides to snap us out of it. 

I have struggled with anxiety and catastrophic thinking since childhood. I’m talking “I failed that spelling test, now my teacher thinks I’m dumb, now they’re going to ignore me and I’ll fail more and I’ll fail the class and never get into college and have to live in a box for the rest of my life” type of catastrophic thinking. Now, I’ve come a long way in managing those spirals, but sometimes my brain likes to slip in there with a mean thought at the most inopportune moments. 

Like today- It was brought to my attention that I maybe haven’t been communicating something well (and honestly, I may just be assuming the worst from a neutral message…thanks brain), and a small voice in my head whispers, “You’re not good enough.”

Or I have a conversation with a new person and the voice says, “You overshared and now they think you are weird and shouldn’t be here.”

Maybe you’ve had moments with that same voice. 

“You’re a failure.”
“You’re an imposter.”
“Just wait, the other shoe will drop.”
“They’re just being nice, but they really don’t like you.”

Those thoughts, that voice, are hard to ignore. The words burrow in your heart and you start to believe them. You begin to doubt your gifts and abilities, and fear taking steps forward because you just know you’ll fall on your face. 

Do you know who is really hoping you will listen to those voices? Who is hoping you’ll shrink back from being who God created you to be? Satan. 

Is Satan literally whispering in your ear? Probably not, but those doubts and fears you have stem from our fallen fleshy brains and he LOVES when those fallen fleshy brains stop us from fulfilling our God given purpose. 

So now that we know that these thoughts are lies, what are the truths? How do I stop these doubts from taking over? Beyond therapy, here are some things I’ve found help interrupt those thoughts when they pop up:

First, remember where those thoughts are coming from (fallen fleshy brain) and who they benefit (no one worth benefiting).

Take a breath. 

Next, remember how God made you and how He sees you. God knew and loved you even before you were born and you are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:13-14). He created you with a unique purpose that only you can fulfill (Ephesians 1:3-6). He loves you so much that he sent his son, Jesus, to die for you so that you can be with him for eternity (John 3:16). He has you where you are for a reason and is with you even when you feel like a failure (Deuteronomy 31:6). 

Finally, look for the little ways God is showing himself and rooting you on. Friends who reach out at just the right time, coworkers who want to help, hearing one person say thank you, or having the perfect Bible verse pop into your head are gifts from Him to keep you grounded and moving forward. 

For some of us, those voices will never fully go away, but in the midst of those voices, hear this: The Creator of the universe created you, He brought you to where you are for a reason, and He has your back always. 

You are not a failure. 

You are a beautiful, purposefully created, loved beyond measure child of God.